Tuesday, February 21, 2012

Doi



Praful de stele din ochii gri şi cuminţi,
mâna pe jumătate adormită, prinsă în mrejele castanii încă...
Vocea ta, floare delicată de magnolie,
vibrând alene prin vise în culori.
Bucăţi din tine!

Le adun şi le spulber,
le strâng într-un pumn de amintiri frumoase
şi le arunc la întâmplare...
Vântul nervos le împrăştie departe,
unde nici cu gândul nu pot ajunge.
Le transformă, le modelează haotic.
Te ascunde, te schimbă...
Nu rămâne nimic pentru o clipă... nici măcar speranţa...

Inimă grea, otrăvită...
Frunză uscată de arţar, călcată în picioare de un miriapod;
Inimă spartă, crestată pe margini fără milă...

Dar...
Fluturi grei, aripi ascunse în lumini
îţi povestesc singura cale pe care o cunoşti dintotdeauna...
Paşi din cer te poartă înapoi viu, complet, până la ultima picătură de sânge.
Te primesc şi te cutremuri...
Îmi săruţi venele, parfumul, gândurile, fiinţa!
Te ating, te prind, te gust, te trăiesc!

Sunday, February 19, 2012

Changes




Is that evil angel sitting on his left shoulder... Kisses get bitter, the sunrise is burning and growing up has never hurt this bad. 

It's like having picked the wrong fortune cookie, predicting the bad luck, the misery he is going to go through from now on. Those so much craved sweets, those random pieces, those full of mystery steps on the floor... 

Nothing changed, he keeps singing the same songs, touching the same hands, calling the same past, but still the courage is low and he cannot be there anymore... His heart is broken and gave up waiting. Playing by the same rules is no longer acceptable and desired...
Now he's going to that place, the only one he knows and needs now... The boulevard of broken hearts...

Once upon a thousand times (1)

   
 Burden

   Once upon a time, there was an empty box, called Luce. Wooden, classically carved, destined to be a shelter for burdens.
    Luce was waiting everyday to be filled by something. But no one seemed to notice he existed. They kept him in a corner, in the attic ever since they brought him. Anyway, he was patient, dreaming that some good books will be his guests some day. Those sweet love novels written by a famous writer he has heard about so often. Or maybe he’ll have the chance to keep inside the history of a baby, some colourful toys the little one has played with during his early years. Or who knows what they  might use him for… This is the way Luce spent his existence, thinking and waiting, and thinking and waiting, and….
    One day, he felt something very unpleasant, heavy, like someone had dropped all the darkness in the Universe inside… What was that? He suddenly felt sad, depressed, unhappy, all these together and he realized that what was thrown in there, invading his space, his emptiness, was a dead, miserable, broken heart. A heart that has passed through the rainiest autumn ever, that has endeavoured too many avalanches, that had nothing left… Nothing but this box to lay down and put itself together, maybe...
    Luce, as the time went by, felt that this new unexpected burden became every day more unbearable, but isn’t this what he was designed for? Wasn’t he waiting for something? He only got what he desired… at least partially…
   
   But then a miracle happened...

Wednesday, February 15, 2012

Short



This butterfly has cancer... His wings are not dark blue anymore, they are turning pale and he's full of deadly spots... He has been thrown in the middle of chaos, in an acid rain drop that completely changed him... He tried to fly again, to breathe the weight of the storm, to absorb within his tiny soul the last hours of life on a fairy leaf...
But he couldn't make it. He jumped right in the arms of that monster, who was waiting for him, starving and craving for those noble wings, those soft microscopic eyes, that short cursed destiny on Earth...
Who or what can save him? Who or what can make the supreme sacrifice so that he lives?...
No one, of course. Full of hope he will be born again some day, some other life, on another planet; he closes his eyes and cares no more... It's over, right here, right now...

And he didn't even get the chance to...

Sunday, January 8, 2012

Let them in



They are coming back... People from your past... When you least expect it, it happens! 
You thought you'd never see them or hear about them again... But here they are. You talk to them or even meet them. You find out so much about what they've become since you've seen them last time and it makes you smile with joy knowing that they are ok  :)
And it feels kind of good to have them back. (I mean, why not?) They say everything happens for a reason. You might wonder sometimes what is the reason for this and find no answer. But who cares anyway? They are persons you cared about somehow, who meant a lot for you at that time and you're glad they are back, even if they have changed and so did your relationship with them.
However, God knows better. And you can do nothing but accepting or rejecting their presence into your life.. Your choice will be, of course, the first one as you know you have so much to learn from every person that walks next to you on your path...

Thursday, December 29, 2011

Dilemma



I had a friend once ... She was one of my best friends... So I thought at that time... But I don't know what happened... I was happy with all I had, I was feeling blessed with all that and of course I was sharing it with the beloved ones, including her... I think it was then when she started to act strangely. I felt that she ignored me and wasn't very pleased with me being happy. Although she had almost all she wanted from life. Anyway, I didn't feel ok about the way she was treating me sometimes. Maybe I exaggerated and I acted a little bit immature when I decided to put an end to that relationship and the way I did it. Now it seems so stupid. She did wrong, I did wrong. We acted like silly girls, instead of trying to accept each other with all our flaws and qualities. I guess this is a very important thing to do, accepting the other even if he/ she is not perfect..
I am sorry, she knows that. I don't know if she is sorry too, but... We are supposed to be acquaintances, at least in theory, but we haven't spoken to each other for more than a year...
However, now, when I look behind, I cannot stand but having a few regrets and a dilemma. Will it be OK to try a new link with her or... is it better to let things just the way they are ?...

After all, I already have three true best friends...

Monday, December 19, 2011

Best wishes



Shall you find roses in life, may you enjoy their scent and fragile petals...
Shall you get lost in creepy forests, may you have the strength to look up to the sky, use your wings to fly beyond the clouds and touch the rainbow...
Shall you ever have to walk through rain, may you be able to realize that every drop is a musical note that together make the most beautiful waltz of life, so that you can learn to dance it.

Shall December be too harsh, may you carry in your soul April sun's warm and sweet smile to comfort you.
Shall love take your hand and guide you through life, may you never let go because, as they say sometimes: Love can be a tiny hand holding your finger, a slobbery wet kiss, little chubby cheeks, and an innocent sweet smile...

La vie en gris



Petite enfante, vêtue dans des haillons, chantant des hymnes inconnus à haute voix...
Tes murs sont si tristes quelquefois. Tes peintures craquées, jetées sur la terre, ne racontent plus de braves histoires. Tous les hommes osent les fouler aux pieds sans pitié.
Tu n'est pas folle, ma chère, quoique tu voles toujours haut que les nuages, espérant qu'un jour ta main touche au moins un rayon de soleil. Mais la pluie joue avec toi maintenant. Les gouttes étincelantes dansent sur toi, envahissent même ton âme qui est si loin..
Tu cherches un arc-en-ciel pour te cacher, pour nuancer un peu tes yeux fatigués.
Les mains dans les poches, tu trouves une pièce d'un puzzle qui ne t'appartient pas et aussi un vide que tu devrais commencer à remplir en ce moment. C'est très simple, tu sais. Car dans ton univers éclaté, tu as suffisants crayons de couleurs pour en créer encore un. Ne crains rien. Tu est forte, si forte que tu pourrais construire ton propre soleil, à partager, si tu veux, avec tous ceux qui t’entourent.

Sunday, November 20, 2011

C'est pas ta faute...




Tu as changé beaucoup. Tu n’es plus l'enfant éternel qu'on rencontrait toujours dans le bois enchantée les nuits, sous la lune ensommeillée. Les chevaux sauvages et les fleurs qui parlent ne te connaissent plus... Tu ne peux pas courir maintenant. Les pieds lourds t’empêchent t’éloigner de ta propre vie. Tu ne peux pas d’y échapper. C'est la vie réelle que tu n'aimes, bien sûr, mais... Mais qu'est-ce qu'on peut faire?

Tu dois cesser la chercher. Tu le sais très bien. Tu ne la trouveras... Elle est partie et jamais reviendra. Jamais!  
Ne l'oublie pas, gardes sa pureté dans une coquille sur les profondeurs de la mer fâchée... Scelles-la dans un beau souvenir, dans ton grand poing, dans les pages jaunies d'un journal perdu, dans tes yeux en larmes...

Tu as grandi, mais c'est pas ta faute. Mademoiselle Enfance est partie simplement parce que tu t’es cachée dans un monde elle ne pouvait plus vivre. Elle aurait meurt si elle avait resté. Mais elle a laissé Monsieur Amour te protéger, t'enseigner que la maturité peut être la plus belle période de ta vie. Toutefois, tu dois être prudente: les blessures qu'on  te cause quelques fois peuvent être si profondes...



Monday, November 14, 2011

A big fat "NO"!



NO! I don't want to grow up! So what I am acting like a child most of the times? So what I am still a day dreamer? So what I am living in a world of my own? I know I drive you crazy most of the times, but as I already told you a thousand times, I'm not doing it on purpose. This is just the way I am.
It's enough that sometimes I fall out of the sky on the ground, my life breaking into pieces. It's enough that I suffocate every time I see my ID card that reveals an age I will always neglect as my teenager body and soul speak louder than any document.
This is why I don't allow any white hair stain my youth. I'm not ready, not yet.  I am and will always be merciless with old age as long as the purity of my heart is my guide in life... And I believe this is how it will always be :)

And more than that, who likes the tempestuous weather real life offers? Who likes the hurricanes that invade our most serene days, without any warning? Well, I don't like any of this, not at all! That's why I prefer the soft clouds among which I live and the rainbows that protect me from the darkness. So, if you need me, please let me know and I will come down once in a while, if you insist. But, hey! Note that I'm counting on you to keep the dangers away! :P

Am nouă vieți




Nu sunt o felină adormită
pe un cuib de jăratic,
în nopți de decembrie.

Sunt o zeiță nepovestită vreodată nimănui...
În mine și în afară de mine
freamătă minuni cristice,
o cascadă de foșnete surde
din umbra unui suflet sălbatic...

Dulce ca o floare de măr
zărită printre pleoape grele,
lumina ochilor tăi mă copleșește, 
zdrobindu-mă lent,
în zorii dimineților cu flori de gheață.

Și te privesc... lung - prelung,
cum te joci pe asfaltul ființei mele livide
cu mii de culori,
așa cum toamna își face de cap
în grădină după ploile fierbinți de august...

...Mă cuibăresc din nou, la nesfârșit,
citindu-ți din vise
o poveste cu final aşteptat,
în care Romeo și Julieta
trăiesc fericiți.
Da! Ai ghicit: până la adânci bătrâneți...

So who needs a dreamworld...



... when real life is amazing? :)

having the chance to look everyday in the deepest blue eyes, drowning into them and never getting enough;

being spoiled with the warmest, tightest hugs and never wanting to escape them;

having for dessert millions of sweet kisses and still craving for them every second you can't taste them;

sleeping cosily every night in his arms, knowing that nothing bad will happen as long as he watches over you so that you only have puffy dreams;

never wanting to let go of his hand, no matter how harsh some moments might be;

smiling body and soul, especially when his childish smile is the only sun that can make you rise and shine every morning;

having solid plans for the future and imagining together how your first child will be

etc. etc. etc.

This can be called without any doubt full happiness and it can anytime beat dreamworlds of any kind.
If you have all these, you can considered yourself a blessed person...

And maybe sometimes...


... it's better to be happy with what you have... especially when he says:


Feeling like...


I feel like a happy fruit, hanging on a tree's branch ready to be picked by someone. But that someone doesn't appear. I am so high, never to be reached, never to be eaten... I love my position and I hope the wind will blow gentle so that the ground won't reach me instead...

I feel free like a bumble bee during a summer day, happily visiting every flower in the garden. They think I am working hard, but today I don't want to do that. All I want is to feel the sweetness of each flower pouring through my veins...

I feel like an empty glass having the opportunity to chose the drink that will fill it. For now, my choice would be something sour and a little bit spicy, colourful like a child's dream in the arms of his mother...

I feel like saying "Good night & Sweet dreams" to my love and falling asleep in his arms...






Friday, November 11, 2011

Paşi spre lumină




Timpul se grăbeşte, înfiorat de locuri –
Picuri firave de-amar cenuşiu, crud.
Bate noapte adâncă, sunete reci aud;
În inima-mi pustie nu mai plâng focuri...

M-atinge cu-aripi mute vremea-ntunecată;
Nu vreau albastru cer să am deasupra mea,
Ci doar natura verde să-ntindă mâna sa
Asupra ochilor – vâltoare azi secată...

Alung c-un gând naiv nelinişti grele:
Vreau flori de soare s-acopere văzduhul,
Izvoare de lumină să străpungă-n suflet lutul,
Frunzele răsăritului de viaţă să fie-ale mele!

Musafir nepoftit




Vieţi atât de tomnatice ard,
Frunze de aur năvalnice cad,
Bolta cerească-i învăluită de cenuşă...
Ea nu mai stă de mult la uşă.

A intrat vijelioasă cu ploi triste,
Aducându-şi dansul în a mea casă;
Împrăştie de zor lacrimi în batiste
Şi să zâmbesc o clipă nu mă lasă...

Cântecul mut al florilor nu-l mai aud...
Nu-i nimeni să-mi şteargă obrazul ud,
Iar tu, Toamnă, nu mai vrei să pleci,
Îmi spinteci soarele cu raze reci...

O îmbrăţişare aş da stejarilor
Învăluiţi de-o caldă amărăciune.
Melancolie citesc în ochii lor,
Fără culori plăpânde de Răpciune...

Nu pleca! Mai stai o clipă,
Nu-mi lua încă trena ta grăbită!
Mai alină-mi puţin dorul greu...
Nu aripile grele ţi le alung eu,

Ci doar amarul leac ce mi-l dai
Să mi-adap chinul ... zi după zi
O podoabă dulce oare de ce n-ai?
Dacă mi-ai da viaţă, Toamnă ai mai fi?

Friday, November 4, 2011

Suflet bacovian




Ger năprasnic... pentru ultima oară
Golul apasă şi-ncepe să doară.
Somnul tristeţii mă-nvăluie greu...
De ce-aruncă venin în sufletul meu?

Zăpada răsună, m-aruncă în iarnă,
Dar mă-nconjoară o aprigă toamnă.
Totul e rece, pustiu şi vântul
Împodobeşte din timp cu flori aşezământul...

M-alungă pe trepte negre de piatră
O clipă tainică de timp îngheţată...
Şi vine, şi pleacă: se joacă cu mine,
Şopteşte şi urlă! Câtă cruzime!

Nu mai aud glasuri şi inimi de viaţă,
Îmi căntă norii – văluri de ceaţă...
M-atinge cu frunze uscate demult,
Nu!... Nu e moartea, e... sufletu-mi mut!



Martorii iubirii



Vântul a tresărit printre crengi;
Mii de petale sunt acum fluturi
Ce-mi aduc şoaptele lor parfumate...
Zarzărul.

Un roi de luminiţe jucându-mi în ochi –
Dragostea s-a născut... din înalt,
Dar noaptea îi va adormi clopoţeii...
Salcâmul.

Cu mireasma sa dulce m-a atras
Când florile-i de aur s-au trezit
Clipind somnoroase din gene de miere...
Teiul.

Verde... veşnic verde, dar cu ace reci
Aduce durere multă. Dar iubire?
Dacă ar avea, s-ar stinge la sfârşit de toamnă…
Bradul.

Un 2024 cât mai bun!

Pexels: Jill Wellington Sunt aproape 3 ani de când nu am mai scris aici și mai pe nicăieri. Prioritățile au fost altele, viața s-a scurs ori...